What is Circle of Security Parenting?

This year I started offering a positive parenting course called “Circle of Security”. My current course runs over 4 Monday nights from 7-9pm and it’s Zoom based so parents can attend from the comfort of their own homes. It makes it so much easier than having to find babysitters! At times all parents feel lost or without a clue about what their child might need from them when they’re upset. This is where the Circle of Security® Parenting™ program comes in.

What are the Circle of Security course learning objectives?

• Read your child’s emotional cues and needs better.
• Learn ways to help your child successfully manage their emotions.
• Learn how to develop a more positive and secure relationship with your child.
• Enhance the development of your child’s self-esteem and resilience.

Secure attachment is the key concept underpinning the of Circle of Security Parenting. When a child has secure attachment, it means that they feel safe and secure in the knowledge that they are protected by their primary caregivers and that their needs will be met in a caring and responsive way. There are so many wonderful benefits that come from this including:

• Increased problem-solving capability.
• Less anger at their parents.
• Better and longer lasting friendships.
• Increased confidence.
• Improved ability to deal with their emotions.
• Better resilience.

How can you create a securely attached baby?

There has been a lot of study and research into attachment for the last 60 years. Alan Sroufe, a developmental psychologist at the Institute for Child Development at the University of Minnesota, puts it well when he says: “The baby needs to know that they’re massively important. A caregiver should be involved, attentive, sensitive, and responsive.” The good news is that in order for secure attachment to occur, parents only have to get the right response 30% of the time!

Actions to take as a secure attachment parent:

• When they cry, find out why and solve their problem.
• Stay calm if you can – they respond to your vibes and regulate their emotions based on how you feel.
• Hold your baby lovingly in your arms – they regulate their heart beats based on yours.
• Give them positive feedback as much as you can – a smile, a positive look, talking back to them.
• FUN FACT: Babies recognise their parents’ voices from the start and they prefer them to anyone else’s!

I highly recommend “Why Love Matters – How Affection Shapes a Baby’s Brain”, by Sue Gerhardt, if you’re an expecting parent or a parent already. If you’ve enjoyed this blog and would like more Circle of Security information, please feel free to check out my upcoming courses and book your spot.