Do you feel like you have positive self-esteem as an adult? For many of my Brisbane Positive Parenting clients self esteem is something they definitely want to help build in their children. There are very simple ways you can do this for your child. Positive self esteem will help build their resilience throughout their childhood years and really benefit them as adults
- Choose your battles wisely. Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither is self esteem. Decide on one area to address, like chores or homework. and focus on that until you see success. Then, tackle another issue – this will really help to build up their self-esteem.
- Align the adults. Ensure all adults are on the same page. Hash out any disagreements and come up with positive parenting rules and consequences everyone can live with.
- Create opportunities for success. Catch them being good. Set small goals that your child can easily attain. Focus on one small step until it is achieved consistently, and then add something else. Start when they are young, and life is much easier when they get older.
- Allow mistakes and failure without judgment. Let them fail and make mistakes until they get it right – without too much pressure. You’re well on your way to building positive self esteem for your children.
What else can you do to build positive self-esteem in your children?
- Teach what you want them to learn. Be clear about your expectations. Show your child how to do things. Model for them by doing it in your life. Verbal instructions are often insufficient and set kids up for failure or low self-esteem. Don’t overwhelm them with too many things to do at once – one or two at the most for verbal instruction.
- Reinforce what you want more of. Praise them when they do what you want – especially when they do it well or go above and beyond. Be specific about what they did that you like and tell them you appreciate it.
- Raise the bar. Teaching responsibility requires accountability. Building confidence and positive self esteem requires that children successfully achieve their responsibilities. Praise their progress and encourage them to finish successfully.
- Do the hard stuff. Follow through with what you say you will do – good, bad or indifferent. Learning from mistakes is great to building your child’s self-esteem.